Dec 7, 2022Liked by Jenny duBay

Thank you. I can honestly say I never obcessed with controling my ex-husban's behavior. I knew he would need to change by his own free will and from his own heart. I endeavored to change myself in the hopes of creating an stable, peaceful enviroment for my kids. As time went on I obcessed over getting away and being free. Most of the time I lived in a daze of sadness and fear, traumertized and confused to the point of being unable to act because with an abuser no matter how you handle the situation rightly or wrongly, it won't work. They have a come back for everything. Often contradicting their own self. Withnan abuser the name of the game is control, and they will say or do anything to be in control! They are obcessed with control and power over their victim!

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You describe well the confusing situation of a victim of domestic abuse, Kathleen! I'm so sorry for your suffering, yet I appreciate that you're sharing your story now for the help and healing of others. The label of "codependency" has been bantered about by far too many therapists (I can personally attest to that) and it truly is misguided and damaging. Thank you for your testimony!

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